Tuesday's Haiku

The conveyor belt
of life keeps moving, whether
you're on it or not

Monday's Haiku

This muscle stiffness
proves once and for all that work's
a pain in the neck

Weekend Haiku's

Would you like to talk
about why everyone else
is better than you?

---------------------------- 

Gray hair denotes age,
experience and no cash
for hair coloring

Friday's Haiku

Never part of the
cool kids' table, I'm now not
even in the room

Thursday's Haiku

I can't care less, for
to do so, I would have to
care to begin with

Wednesday's Haiku

Negativity
and frustration differ since
with one, you still care

Tuesday's Haiku

Without moving my
chair, my place here, my view, has
now changed completely

Monday's Haiku

It's okay to talk
to me anytime, but don't
expect I'll listen

Weekend Haiku's

The window of my
heart is fragile, and made up
of multiple panes

------------------------------

Sometimes even the
best candidates don't make it
onto the ballot

Friday's Haiku

Masturbation is
basically just a way to
give yourself a hand

Thursday's Haiku

Though she rarely slept,
She bought a new bed for it's
recreational use

Wednesday's Haiku

You can always tell
the Dogwood tree from all the
others by it's bark

Tuesday's Haiku

She removed the fake
moustache, as she received too
many compliments

Monday's Haiku

I'd apologize
to haiku haters, but I'm
out of syllables

Weekend Haiku

I take vitamin
D supplements, as my sun
comes in caplet form

-------------------------

Disappointed by
the pole's length, I then told her
it's telescoping

Friday's Haiku

Autographing your
school chair doesn't make it an
assigned seat, Billy

Thursday's Haiku

Waiting for my phone
interview, I wonder why
I wore a new tie

Wednesday's Haiku

A celebrity
now, she's forgotten all of
her friends from before

Tuesday's Haiku

She gives me her sweet
pillow kisses, even when
we're both standing up

Monday's Haiku

My pains are being
caused by the one disease that
has no cure: old age

Mother's Day Bonus Haiku

Don't be a mother
and not thank your Mother for
being a Mother

Weekend Haiku's

Twenty-five year old
photos show you don't always
make the best choices

----------------------------

I find balconies
to be just a patio
with an attitude

Friday's Haiku

I'd be a dancer
still if it wasn't for skill,
gravity and beer

Thursday's Haiku

"I must agree, the
flowered sundress is great, but
not on me," he said

Wednesday's Haiku

When you return from
Kathmandu, you will never
shout about traffic

Tuesday's Haiku

Visitors are like
pimples, they always arrive
when you don't want them

Monday's Haiku

"Bikini watching
sucks at this beach," he said.  She
replied, "It's midnight."