Weekend haiku

Bill fell off of a  

twelve story building and lived!  

Bill is a pigeon  

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Don't rock the vending  

machine, as it prefers an    

Alan Jackson song

Friday haiku

Falling off a bike  

tends to be much better than  

falling on a bike

Thursday haiku

 Insurrection at  

the Capitol. While Trump cheers,  

I write this hi-coup

Wednesday haiku

 Falling apart is  

only slightly better than  

disintegrating 

Tuesday haiku

 He tried to write a  

haiku, but thought syllables  

were on a drum set

Monday haiku

He tried to write a  

haiku, but needed a friend  

to count to seven

Weekend haiku

 Some say Trump reads at  

a fifth grade level, which is  

cruel to fifth graders  

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Two million Scoville  

is less a hot sauce, and more  

a colon blaster

Friday haiku

 Some say Trump can't read  

above a fifth grade level,  

which feels a bit high

Thursday haiku

Okay, now that we  

have that out of our system,  

we can move forward

Wednesday haiku

Wherever David  

Byrne travels, he asks himself,  

"How did I get here?"

Tuesday haiku

 Crosby, Stills and Nash  

are getting older because  

they cannot be Young

Monday haiku

Impeach the impeared,  

or he won't beleave the laws  

appley to him

Weekend haiku

He said he wanted  

to do something no other  

President had done  

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I just don't get Trump's  

definition of "winning".  

This feels like "losing".

Friday haiku

 You know you have messed  

up when you have been impeached  

more times than Nixon

Thursday haiku

 Batman is banned from  

forming a new team, as he  

should be just this league

Wednesday haiku

 The underwater  

restaurant was popular  

with scuba diners

Tuesday haiku

Jill, no longer a  

virgin, cried whenever she  

saw cherry blossoms

Monday haiku

When the bowlers went  

out two states over, they were  

way out of their league

Weekend haiku

 I asked her, "Should we  

explore the painted caves in  

France?" She said, "Lescaux!"  

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When E broke his foot,  

it was all because he had  

been F'n around

Friday haiku

 The only difference  

between Trump and Nero is  

Nero can fiddle

Thursday haiku

 When Trump's hoodlums stormed 

Congress, our democracy  

was also trampled

Wednesday haiku

 I promise, I will  

write you down, and respect you,  

if you do return

Tuesday haiku

 When she flies, she gets  

us closer to the sun than  

we could get ourselves

Monday haiku

Outside this door, a  

Saint Bernard puppy wills me  

to not be afraid

Weekend haiku

 It might be a new  

year, but last year's menacing  

shadow is still here  

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She's the type of girl  

who, without restrictions, hits  

the sky while in flight

Friday haiku

 All is quiet on  

New Year's Day, except for that  

guy Bono, singing