Weekend haiku

Almost daily now,
my positive ions get
negatively charged 

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The giraffe may not
be a very good kisser,
but he loves to neck

Friday's haiku

I guess they're called bangs
for the way that her hair shoots
off of her forehead

Thursday's haiku

She starightened her hair,
losing the only lift, curl
and bounce in her life

Wednesday's haiku

Her lies fill the room,
suffocating the truth, like
a dollar perfume

Tuesday's haiku

Her promises are
gone before the words have been
finished being heard

Monday's haiku

Her promises are
like cotton candy, melting
away in her mouth

Weekend haiku

It's raining and I'd
share my umbrella, but I
don't like you that much 

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She spent over an
hour grumbling about a
job she rarely does

Friday's haiku

My buoyant balloon
cannot continue to soar
with all of these weights

Thursday's haiku

The paint was never
freezing as he was always
wearing many coats

Wednesday's haiku

The metal fencing
for the ranch wasn't bent, it
was corral-gated

Tuesday's haiku

Ironically, the
dentist bought sweets to reward
patients for brushing

Monday's haiku

The fabric on Ms.
Spelling's monument was a
statue Tori cape

Weekend haiku

Since I write almost
everyday, how can I
always be so wrong 

----------------------- 

The belly button
fuzz wasn't merely real good,
it was excel-lint

Friday's haiku

Woven containers
holding all your fishing gear
are bass kit baskets

Thursday's haiku

The flower basket
had no aroma, but it
had a nice bouquet

Wednesday's haiku

Monuments for what
you can't do are all statues
of limitations

Tuesday's haiku

The evil statue
may not be golden, but it
is covered in guilt

Monday's haiku

The earthquake may cause
lots of problems and such, but
this was not his fault

Weekend haiku

The earthquake liked to
just drink martinis that were
shaken and not stirred 

--------------------------- 

The earthquake was thin,
so he never seemed to mind
getting on the scale

Friday's haiku

She's so pregnant, her
stomach arrives at least ten
minutes before her

Thursday's haiku

Belly dancing made
her ill, as she didn't have
the stomach for it

Wednesday's haiku

The belly dancer
turned the entire crowd into
all navel gazers

Tuesday's haiku

The silent movie
isn't quick, but it's faster
than the speed of sound

Monday's haiku

The silent movie
was so amazing, it left
everyone speechless

Weekend Haiku

Terry liked the robe,
as it was soft, warm, blue
and made from his cloth 

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His beard is wild and
unkempt, and while not scary,
it is hair-raising