Thursday haiku

It's hard to have a
poetry meeting when I'm
the only one here

Wednesday haiku

Nicole likes to wear
pink, because yellow makes her
look like a lemon

Tuesday haiku

AC/DC, now 
with Axl, makes me jealous 
of Brian's deafness

Monday haiku

Norman Mailer head
butted Gore Vidal over
women's rights. Manly!!

Weekend haiku

The green guy on the
corner wanting carrots is
a rutabaga

--------------------------

Walking in, our new
house still has that new house smell,
or maybe that's bleach

Friday haiku

The tomato in
the hot tub was so upset,
he was just stewing

Thursday haiku

We cage gorillas,
then kill them when one of us
dares enter their space

Wednesday haiku

There are so many
crowns on my teeth, my mouth could
now rule Great Britain

Tuesday haiku

Billy's gone from our
work world, so there will now be
less hugs and less smiles

Monday haiku

The incontinent
bear always slept alone at
hibernation time

Weekend haiku

Pediatricians
are doctors who spend all their
time kidding around 

-------------------------------- 

I was cut from the
ad campaign, as they wanted
it to make money

Friday haiku

She asked, "Are your words
romantic or erotic?"
He replied, "Why or?"

Thursday haiku

The feminist told
him, "It's okay to have a
dick, just don't be one."

Wednesday haiku

Ozzy Osbourne is
a vegetarian, must
have been a fruit bat

Tuesday haiku

Bill's wealth of knowledge
was actually only
worth a buck fifty

Monday haiku

Bill likes to be spanked,
for good health, claiming it adds
color to his cheeks

Weekend haiku

Dental appointment
in five days, I've got four days
before I must floss 

-------------------------------- 

She smiles at me, as
if I were an abandoned
puppy, which is nice

Friday haiku

Yes, it takes many
nails to build the crib, but just
one screw to fill it

Thursday haiku

The fine droplets of
water will alight on blades
of grass in dew time

Wednesday haiku

The wizard rabbi
knows all, except which hat he
should be wearing now

Tuesday haiku

I wrote this haiku
for my psychic mom, but she
knew it was coming

Monday haiku

Dressed in fishnets and
high heels, he'd misunderstood
what drag racing meant

Weekend haiku

He'd thought he found a
large seed in his juicy peach,
and that's a pity

------------------------------

I missed my high school
reunion, now I don't know
if I'm popular

Friday haiku

The Cook family,
all twelve of them, found they could
not make a good broth

Thursday haiku

They say beauty is
only skin deep, also true
for melanoma

Wednesday haiku

Most knights know it takes
a special kind of queen to
make that kingdom come