Tuesday haiku

Trump kills National
Endowment For the Arts. How
art-less can he be?

Monday haiku

Trump kills National
Endowment For the Arts, so
now he's less endowed

Weekend haiku

John Hurt dies, leaving
six decades of great acting.
He's gone, we're more hurt

------------------------------

Trump pays prostitutes
to pee on bed Obama
slept in. LIVE STREAM NOW!!

Friday haiku

Waking up at noon,
out of bed at two, Bill snarls,
"God, I hate mornings!"

Thursday haiku

Swatting at all the
mosquitoes swarming around
him, Sam shouts, "SUCKERS!"

Wednesday haiku

"For population
control" should be the slogan
for the NRA

Tuesday haiku

Giving the whip to
the big winner, we told her,
"Con-flagellations!"

Monday haiku

Julie believes that
children are primarily
dirt with attitudes

Weekend haiku

If I do happen
to get into heaven, my
soles will have scorch marks

-------------------------------

I missed my chance at
a swingers party, as I
prefer monkey bars

Friday haiku

Thomas Dolby was
blinded by science, for me
it was always math

Thursday haiku

Because of Jaws, I
still get scared whenever I
hear those two damn notes

Wednesday haiku

While the ladies were
at the baby shower, the
men drank beer next door

Tuesday haiku

Baby showers are
misnamed, rarely a baby
or shower in sight

Monday haiku

Martin, It's still a
dream, but in time, I do hope
we can all get there

Weekend haiku

Restaurant's phone number
in the men's room, with the words,
"For a good Thai call..."

--------------------------------------

Bullying is just
overcompensation by
the perfect people

Friday haiku

While not judgmental,
Bill tends to look down upon
women's low-cut tops

Thursday haiku

The Candy Crush fan
parked next to three other white
cars and disappeared

Wednesday haiku

Resistance is life's
way of telling you you're not
pushing hard enough

Tuesday haiku

My ex-wife was, and
now forever will be, known
as my bitter half

Monday haiku

He knows you can't eat
flowers, but he will nibble
her juicy tulips

Weekend haiku

He chose "Cacao" as
his safe word, because it has
a big "ow" in it

-----------------------------

I will show you my
YouTube, if you will let me
play with your Twitter

Friday haiku

Coffee: the magic
elixir that almost makes
daylight bearable

Thursday haiku

Regarding Spring, the
rumor is that April may
and June will follow

Wednesday haiku

Jill's Dad is like a
God. She's never seen him, but
knows that he exists

Tuesday haiku

Zombie Bob Marley
is back from the dead, ready
to smoke the bad guys

Monday haiku

2016 is
gone, celebrities can breath
a sigh of relief