Tuesday haiku

When talking to a 
zombie, don't brag you got the 
brains in the family

Monday haiku

War is hell, unless 
you're an arms dealer, warlord, 
or politician

Weekend haiku

Walking the trail, her 
dog kept stopping and sniffing, 
checking his pee-mail 

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Stupidity is 
really just another word 
for politician

Friday haiku

Based on movies and 
t.v., once you go zombie, 
you never go back

Thursday haiku

Their race to eat all 
the different styles of Asian 
food ends in a Thai

Wednesday haiku

Hilary listens 
to "Dark Side of the Moon", while 
Trump just plays "The Wall"

Tuesday haiku

No one wants to hit 
the Trump pinata, because 
that is not candy

Monday haiku

Sriracha has a 
rooster on the bottle, but 
it's not for your cock

Weekend haiku

According to her 
nanny, butler, and three friends, 
her shit doesn't stink 

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The only thing fast 
with fast food is how quickly 
the calories rise

Friday haiku

Headphones on, staring 
at a small screen, plugged in yet 
missing here and now

Thursday haiku

Just saying something 
adamantly and loudly 
doesn't make it true

Wednesday haiku

Is it a bad sign 
the day after my birthday 
my watch stops working?

Tuesday haiku

Wearing their cycling 
attire, the group of guys call 
themselves "Jersey Boys"

Monday haiku

Mercury passed so 
close to the sun, it felt like 
me around Julie

Weekend haiku

The plaque, noting Jill's 
soaring spirit is affixed 
to a large boulder 

---------------------------- 

This memorial 
garden is for Jill, who was 
agoraphobic

Friday haiku

AC/DC now 
has Axl Rose; Slash and Duff 
are laughing so hard

Thursday haiku

The ants go marching, 
because that's what you do when 
you're in the Army

Wednesday haiku

Jill's in the summer 
of her life, which would explain 
all the hot flashes

Tuesday haiku

Turning fifty is 
rough, but it's much better than 
the alternative

Monday haiku

The psychedelic 
baker truly believed in 
her flour power

Weekend haiku

Baldness is just God's 
way of telling you that you 
look better in hats 

---------------------------- 

While most folks think poor 
Bill is bald, he knows he's more 
aerodynamic

Friday haiku

Nicole can go from 
classy to hood rat in just 
2.2 seconds

Thursday haiku

The missionary,   
strangely enough, found that he 
preferred doggy-style

Wednesday haiku

Your piss-poor planning, 
and lack of forethought, are now 
somehow my problem?

Tuesday haiku

I pay less for my 
bacon in the evening, since 
it has no night rates

Monday haiku

Jill's in her garden 
so much, the green has spread to 
her entire hand

Weekend haiku

Cast on arm, leg, gauze 
on face, chest and hands makes me 
think, "Hero or klutz?" 

----------------------------------------- 

Jill gardens so much, 
when she gets an idea, a 
tulip bulb appears