Thursday haiku

I think Alyssa 
Milano's one sweet cookie! 
I know, crumby joke

Wednesday haiku

Billy likes to take 
calculated risks, but he's 
really bad at math

Tuesday haiku

Sometimes you find you're 
much better off staying home 
and eating ice cream

Monday haiku

Space Cows: the question 
is in outer space, can the 
farmers hear you cream?

Weekend haiku

If God is such a 
wonderful co-pilot, why 
is there GPS? 

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The internet is 
a dark whore, where you'll get screwed 
and need a shower

Friday haiku

It's great that God's your 
co-pilot, but you need a 
guidance counselor

Thursday haiku

If art is in the 
eye of the beholder, then 
Bobby needs new eyes

Wednesday haiku

For many of us, 
it's a fine, fine line between 
dancing and seizure

Tuesday haiku

According to the
accord for accordion
players, no more cords

Monday haiku

Martin's dream didn't 
include Trump as president, 
though his nightmares did

Weekend haiku

I'm saddest about 
the status of my lattice 
I got for gratis 

----------------------- 

No sex for Donald, 
as it's Melania who 
has put up a wall

Friday haiku

Cracks in the sidewalk 
drink up the rain, like tiny 
mouths thirsty for more

Thursday haiku

Satan's a pervert, 
the one thing on his dirty 
mind is sex, sex, sex

Wednesday haiku

Satan's cosmetic 
surgery went well, now he's 
a handsome devil

Tuesday haiku

My boss says waste is 
not good, but I think inseams 
are pretty evil

Monday haiku

We had an earthquake 
drill today; I wasn't scared, 
but I'm still shaking

Weekend haiku

We had a meeting 
on internal theft, as we 
are missing three spleens 

-------------------------------- 

Some say Time is a 
harsh mistress, but Parsley is 
no picnic either

Friday haiku

Michael threw himself 
off the building, wanting the 
ultimate mic drop

Thursday haiku

Bill is jealous of 
his computer, as it has 
much more memory

Wednesday haiku

The sheep decided 
to sell her computer, as 
she wanted more RAM

Tuesday haiku

Rock and Roll poet 
just wants to read odes, while the 
crowd shouts out, "Free Verse!"

Monday haiku

The blue sky is back, 
maybe just for a moment, 
so I embrace it

Weekend haiku

This morning's sunrise 
was all promise, no payoff, 
an ominous start 

----------------------------------- 

The Apple logo, 
with the bite out of it, leads 
me to Microsoft

Friday haiku

She really likes her 
Pinocchio vibrator, 
but wants a real boy

Thursday haiku

She really likes her  
Pinocchio vibrator,  
asking it to lie   

Wednesday haiku

She really likes her 
Pinocchio vibrator 
swallowed by her whale

Tuesday haiku

January 1st 
reminds me of that U2 
song, "Beautiful Day"