Thursday haiku

Trump holds a bed-in, 
singing, "All we are saying 
is give bleach a chance."

Wednesday haiku

Trump's not a Christian, 
but he did see the light, and 
wants it inside him

Tuesday haiku

Donald Trump is not 
a good team player, but he 
does like the bleachers

Monday haiku

Lysol should be used 
as a cleaner, and not as 
a palette cleanser

Weekend haiku

You should never touch 
a poor man's whiskey, unless 
he offers a sip 

------------------------------------ 

Always drink the rich 
man's whiskey, because the poor 
man's has more value

Friday haiku

You should never touch, 
or take, a rich man's daughter 
or poor man's whiskey

Thursday haiku

Vegan introverts 
are happiest when they don't 
have to meat people

Wednesday haiku

An atheist and 
a theist argued over 
that heavenly space

Tuesday haiku

LGBTQ 
community contest, where 
most lost, one bi won

Monday haiku

Kevin commits the
seven deadly sins daily,
and he's still breathing

Weekend haiku

Sometimes, the poem 
is in control, telling the 
poet where to go 

------------------------------- 

After midnight, in 
a Walmart, makes me believe 
Darwin got it wrong

Friday haiku

If I stay at home 
any more days in a row, 
my butt will grow roots

Thursday haiku

When it rains, the worms 
wriggle out of the earth to 
dance among the drops

Wednesday haiku

We dismiss the shouts 
of praise, hearing only the 
whispers of critics

Tuesday haiku

I have found that most 
salsas are only truly 
hot on the back end

Monday haiku

I sometimes feel like 
a rudderless boat in high 
winds and heavy seas

Weekend haiku

Self isolation 
means I do not have to share 
any of my wine 

---------------------------------- 

You know it's time to 
come home when both you and your 
luggage are broken

Friday haiku

The phrase, "Want to hear 
my poetry?" can help with 
social distancing

Thursday haiku

People staying home 
may keep us from becoming 
endangered species

Wednesday haiku

The weight that you gain 
under this quarantine is 
the Covid-19

Tuesday haiku

People staying home 
will mean the outdoors will be 
bankrupt in six months

Monday haiku

Self isolation: 
or as it's known to older 
folks, retirement

Weekend haiku

We tell folks to stay 
six feet apart, but men are 
bad at measuring 

-------------------------------- 

For some couples, self 
isolation will end in 
divorce or murder

Friday haiku

Social distancing:

another way of saying,

"We're friends on Facebook"

Thursday haiku

The president's well, 
so the coronavirus 
at least has good taste

Wednesday haiku

Coronavirus 
is not an equalizer. 
Sorry, Madonna!