Tuesday haiku

Don't fear the other,  

as without them, there is no  

mother or brother

Monday haiku

Please mark this on your  

calendars: The next Rapture  

will be when I die

Weekend haiku

I knew the Rapture  

wasn't real when I heard that  

Blondie is still here  

-------------------------------  

I knew the Rapture  

wasn't real when I heard that  

there's no man from Mars

Friday haiku

I am not sure why  

I wasn't in the Rapture,  

I wore a nice shirt

Thursday haiku

I get myself in  

trouble all by myself, I  

don't need any help

Wednesday haiku

At the reception,  

I realized I don't dance  

like that anymore

Tuesday haiku

Talking about beer  

is fun, but much better with  

a pint in your hand

Monday haiku

They will be happy  

when the wedding's over and  

their real life begins

Weekend haiku

There once was a man  

from Nantucket who didn't  

understand haiku  

-------------------------------  

Another weekend  

far from home, but another  

weekend close to you

Friday haiku

Those who join ICE are  

the ones not quite good enough  

to join the pol-ice

Thursday haiku

Twenty-one thousand  

genes to be human, and Don's  

are all recessive

Wednesday haiku

She is not sixty.  

She is thirty with double  

the experience

Tuesday haiku

It's her sixtieth  

birthday, though she still feels like  

she is fifty-nine

Monday haiku

Doofer Goofyface  

wants everyone to know that  

names are important

Weekend haiku

Jalapenos and  

my stomach: They get along,  

but sometimes they fight  

----------------------------------  

When it comes to a  

girlfriend, Mickey has found he  

has Minnie options

Friday haiku

Three celebrations  

of life this month. Thankfully,  

none of them were mine

Thursday haiku

She lightly cooed, "There's  

poison in your drink." She was  

his warning sighing

Wednesday haiku

The free radio  

had no volume knob, so he  

couldn't turn it down

Tuesday haiku

When Bill left the room,  

his son ate his cash. He could  

not leave him a loan

Monday haiku

Not getting Bill's snide  

comments, Jill was the chasm  

in his sarcasm

Thursday haiku

Melania and  

Don don't talk anymore. Hey  

Girl, what's your secret??

Wednesday haiku

If you are what you  

eat, Don must consume a lot  

of orange tacos

Tuesday haiku

If you are what you  

eat, Don must consume a lot  

of suckling pig

Monday haiku

When you're unemployed,  

celebrating Labor Day  

feels like a cruel joke