Weekend haiku

That Kansas girl is
so mean and cruel, she put the
witch in Wichita 

________________________ 

Since the Mayans say
the world ends soon, I'll wait on
a new calendar

Friday's haiku

She has a drinking
problem; even with a straw,
she can't find her mouth

Thursday's haiku

Though she's Irish, her
Indian name is "Thunder
on the Horizon"

Wednesday's haiku

She had so many
pennies, she had to put wheels
on her piggy bank

Tuesday's haiku

You can't take pictures
of the positive man, as
there's no negative

Monday's haiku

Below sea level,
it just seems wrong to call this
wide road a highway

Weekend haiku

Sometimes brilliance takes
a day off, deserting me,
and so I write this 

--------------------------- 

Waiting for a book
for a friend, when it arrives,
I can just page him

Friday's haiku

James Dean didn't have
a drug problem, but he had
a speed addiction

Thursday's haiku

She gives her burgers
men's names, so she can tell her
friends she ate Jerry

Wednesday's haiku

She gives her burgers
men's names because it makes them
more fun to consume

Tuesday's haiku

She licked her lips with
each bite because it was weird
to have Bill lick them

Monday's haiku

My attention span
has grown so scattered and so
darn short that I can't...

Weekend haiku

She rode the red bike
inside the office because
her skates were broken 

----------------------------- 

She rode the red bike
inside the office because
she hated traffic

Friday's haiku

Spongebob should really
be asking if those brown pants
make his butt look square

Thursday's haiku

The older I get,
the more my references
keep drawing blank stares

Wednesday's haiku

I was not shocked the
new black hole discovery
was my ex-wife's place

Tuesday's haiku

Carl wore a red coat
during hunting season, which
is smart for a bear

Monday's haiku

Kent does everything
with confidence, and I just
can't imagine why

Weekend haiku

The braces may fix
her teeth, her smile, but she will
always be crooked 

---------------------------------------- 

A good beer is the
only time a guy will request
a little less head

Friday's haiku

Fridays feel so good,
the other days of the week
must get real jealous

Thursday's haiku

Her loss will be felt
the rest of my days, leaving
me a bit less whole

Wednesday's haiku

Stranger stares at me,
worries I'm writing about
her, and she'd be right

Tuesday's haiku

Killing time is much
harder to accomplish well
without something sharp

Monday's haiku

Joan complimented
Sue on her lovely vest, which
she was wearing too

Weekend Haiku

He promised her he
would dance on her grave, so she
was buried at sea 

________________________ 

Leafblowers are loud,
ineffective, and really
just a rich man's rake

Friday Haiku

It would be cool if
Dolly Parton's area
code was (925)