Weekend haiku

Stuck in the hotel,
can't go outside, now paying
for my room and bored 

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Don't touch the hive, my
friend, I've always found it's best
to just let them bee

Friday haiku

Sara's so easy,
she goes in and out more than
a fiddler's elbow

Thursday haiku

Jill's mood goes up and
down more than shock absorbers
on a rocky road

Wednesday haiku

Mozart, to make sweet
music, as you do, takes a
stunning pianist

Tuesday haiku

Her business plan
isn't just practical, it
makes dollars and sense

Monday haiku

Yes, our football team
is great, but the bandwagon
is completely full

Weekend haiku

Jill's super power
is she can make every drop
of wine disappear 

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Since Jill is always
complaining, her new nickname
is "the whinery"

Friday haiku

"That's the funniest
thing I've ever seen" should not
be said while in bed

Thursday haiku

The tragedy of
Prince passing is he didn't
live to see the Dawn

Wednesday haiku

Proctology is
about checking to see if
the sun does shine there

Tuesday haiku

"I've never seen that
before" is a bad phrase at
a rectal exam

Monday haiku

She chastised me for
staring, only to find I
was sleeping soundly

Weekend haiku

Whenever she says
she feels like a new person,
her husband's nervous 

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It's hard to not feel 
like just another number
on a football team

Friday haiku

Better to spend all
your time making love, than all
your love making time

Thursday haiku

Weather forecast for
child photo shoot: flash lightning
and wailing thunder

Wednesday haiku

The ghost likes to drink
expensive whiskey because
he enjoys good booze

Tuesday haiku

Billy carries a
small flask in his hat, just to
keep his spirits up

Monday haiku

My bad handwriting
prevents folks from stealing my
words, or reading them

Weekend haiku

I have self-loathing,
as I don't want to feel left
out from my family 

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Tire losing air,
no nail to be found, so it's
obviously screwed

Friday haiku

The bloated roadkill
smelled terrible, and looked worse,
but it was tasty

Thursday haiku

He drove cross country
with all his belongings, just
so she can't have them

Wednesday haiku

Bill thought "unisex"
meant making sweet love, balanced
on only one wheel

Tuesday haiku

We had nachos for
lunch, before President Trump
tells us that we can't

Monday haiku

While the Boy Scouts won't
allow gays to be leaders,
they can buy popcorn

Weekend haiku

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oh, and it's blurry 

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The chickadee chirps
from his high branch, wondering
why I'm way down here

Friday haiku

She's so excited
to see baby goats, she feels
like a kid again