Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Wednesday's haiku

Bill wears fingerless
gloves, since he has no fingers,
because he's a duck

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Tuesday's haiku

He slurps his soup so
loudly, I can almost taste
the chicken noodle

Monday, April 28, 2014

Monday's haiku

Before November
ends, Christmas ephemera
welcomes December

Saturday, April 26, 2014

Weekend haiku

Oysters and shrimp don't
like to share, as they prefer
to just be shellfish 

------------------------------- 

When the turkey told
us, "Gobble! Gobble!" we did
just as we were asked

Friday, April 25, 2014

Friday's haiku

"Don't be down," she said.
"Thanks for the thought," I replied,
"But I am a goose."

Thursday, April 24, 2014

Thursday's haiku

He wishes he was
taller, so he'd stop looking
people in the chin

Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Wednesday's haiku

Her depression is
not helped by a glass of wine,
as she drinks Merlot

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Tuesday's haiku

It took less than an
hour for work to undo
vacation's sweet bliss

Monday, April 21, 2014

Monday's haiku

I'd be happier
with life if people didn't
depress me so much

Saturday, April 19, 2014

Weekend haiku

My vacation may
not start until Sunday, but
mentally, I'm gone 

----------------------------- 

Winter sounds a lot
like vintner, which must be why
I drink more wine then

Friday, April 18, 2014

Friday's haiku

She looked so much like
my ex-wife Amy, I had
to give her half too

Thursday, April 17, 2014

Thursday's haiku

Her hair was redder
than a New Hampshire maple
leaf in October

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Wednesday's haiku

Anyone who says,
"Just being nominated
is nice," hasn't won

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Tuesday's haiku

Winning this award
is a highlight of my life.
Now it's all downhill.

Monday, April 14, 2014

Monday's haiku

Our gym equipment's
so old, the bike machine is
a penny farthing

Saturday, April 12, 2014

Weekend haiku

Cafeteria
lunch is a game of "Who do
I want to sit by?" 

--------------------------------- 

Embarrassment is
the one thing parents always
can give to their kids

Friday, April 11, 2014

Friday's haiku

Reasonable doubt
means a whole lot more to the
one who knows the truth

Thursday, April 10, 2014

Thursday's haiku

Texting is for those
people who've always been told
that they are all thumbs

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Wednesday's haiku

She was even more
beautiful for the fact she
didn't believe it

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Tuesday's haiku

She nodded a lot,
as she liked to say "yes" and
enjoyed the rattle

Monday, April 7, 2014

Monday's haiku

She always squinted
at her child, as she'd been told,
"Don't stare at the son."

Saturday, April 5, 2014

Weekend haiku

She predicted things
won't get any better and
she's proved herself right 

----------------------------- 

She squinted at Jim,
not wanting to take in his
brilliance all at once

Friday, April 4, 2014

Friday's haiku

Disappointed, Jane
had misread the mentoring
class as men touring

Thursday, April 3, 2014

Thursday's haiku

"With all due respect"
seemingly always precedes
disrespectful things

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Wednesday's haiku

The mastectomy
over, she now likes to wear
double-breasted suits

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Tuesday's haiku

I've always wondered
how the potato keeps the
dirt out of it's eyes