Saturday, December 30, 2017

Weekend haiku

Trump winning is like 
Taco Bell: Both will make us 
run for the border 

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He considered his 
prayers helium balloons 
quickly rising home

Friday, December 29, 2017

Friday haiku

This election year, 
my vote is for what makes the 
most sense: start over

Thursday, December 28, 2017

Thursday haiku

Some believe Donald 
Trump's a Democratic plant, 
but is slime a plant?

Wednesday, December 27, 2017

Wednesday haiku

Tall and slender, she 
glides through her life as if born 
aerodynamic

Tuesday, December 26, 2017

Tuesday haiku

Christmas is over, 
so no holiday music 
for at least three months

Monday, December 25, 2017

Monday haiku

Santa predicted 
toys for all; it was an elf 
fulfilled prophecy

Saturday, December 23, 2017

Weekend haiku

In the desert, you'll 
find that Christmas tends to be 
mainly a mirage 

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Rudolph's red nose was 
actually due to nasal 
deep vein thrombosis

Friday, December 22, 2017

Friday haiku

Happy Holidays 
tends to mean family, friends and 
some kind of liquor

Thursday, December 21, 2017

Thursday haiku

Roy Moore has confused 
the proper age of whiskey 
and of his women

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

Wednesday haiku

Dyslexic devil 
worshippers spend their Christmas 
praying to Santa

Tuesday, December 19, 2017

Tuesday haiku

Living on a dirt 
road means accepting the fact 
all your stuff's dusty

Monday, December 18, 2017

Monday haiku

Migraines are painful 
proof for my family and friends, 
I do have a brain

Saturday, December 16, 2017

Weekend haiku

Bachelors drive a 
Prius, while divorcees all 
tend to drive Escapes 

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Work is life's way of 
telling you your time in high 
school wasn't so bad

Friday, December 15, 2017

Friday haiku

Republicans want 
less government, unless it 
is them governing

Thursday, December 14, 2017

Thursday haiku

Winter mornings, who 
needs coffee to wake up when 
you have icy roads

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

Wednesday haiku

There are times when I'm 
composing, it feels more like 
I'm decomposing

Tuesday, December 12, 2017

Tuesday haiku

Jill says we are all 
God's angels, but I'm sure she 
hasn't met Kevin

Monday, December 11, 2017

Monday haiku

You can blame your butt 
or the concrete, I say it 
must be the asphalt

Saturday, December 9, 2017

Weekend haiku

On Obama's last
day, he was likely singing
George Michael's "Freedom" 

------------------------------------ 

Synthetic fibers 
and campfire sparks are not 
the best of playmates

Friday, December 8, 2017

Friday haiku

I find politics 
and music mix as well as 
lutefisk and chocolate

Thursday, December 7, 2017

Thursday haiku

Ted Nugent beat Cat 
Scratch Fever, but has succumbed 
to Right Wing Fever

Wednesday, December 6, 2017

Wednesday haiku

The feminist says, 
"Man's issue isn't woman, 
man's issue is man."

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Tuesday haiku

Be thankful you're not 
being investigated 
by Robert Mueller

Monday, December 4, 2017

Monday haiku

Dear, Alzheimers is 
never remembering you 
said you were sorry

Saturday, December 2, 2017

Weekend haiku

I've found I see the
world a bit differently while
sitting on the curb 

-------------------------------- 

Marley marinates 
cubes of Pikachu because 
he likes poke, Mon

Friday, December 1, 2017

Friday haiku

In prison, Harvey 
Weinstein is more likely to 
get those massages