Saturday, April 30, 2016

Weekend haiku

Stuck in the hotel,
can't go outside, now paying
for my room and bored 


Don't touch the hive, my
friend, I've always found it's best
to just let them bee

Friday, April 29, 2016

Friday haiku

Sara's so easy,
she goes in and out more than
a fiddler's elbow

Thursday, April 28, 2016

Thursday haiku

Jill's mood goes up and
down more than shock absorbers
on a rocky road

Wednesday, April 27, 2016

Wednesday haiku

Mozart, to make sweet
music, as you do, takes a
stunning pianist

Tuesday, April 26, 2016

Tuesday haiku

Her business plan
isn't just practical, it
makes dollars and sense

Monday, April 25, 2016

Monday haiku

Yes, our football team
is great, but the bandwagon
is completely full

Sunday, April 24, 2016

Weekend haiku

Jill's super power
is she can make every drop
of wine disappear 


Since Jill is always
complaining, her new nickname
is "the whinery"

Friday, April 22, 2016

Friday haiku

"That's the funniest
thing I've ever seen" should not
be said while in bed

Thursday, April 21, 2016

Thursday haiku

The tragedy of
Prince passing is he didn't
live to see the Dawn

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Wednesday haiku

Proctology is
about checking to see if
the sun does shine there

Tuesday, April 19, 2016

Tuesday haiku

"I've never seen that
before" is a bad phrase at
a rectal exam

Monday, April 18, 2016

Monday haiku

She chastised me for
staring, only to find I
was sleeping soundly

Saturday, April 16, 2016

Weekend haiku

Whenever she says
she feels like a new person,
her husband's nervous 


It's hard to not feel 
like just another number
on a football team

Friday, April 15, 2016

Friday haiku

Better to spend all
your time making love, than all
your love making time

Thursday, April 14, 2016

Thursday haiku

Weather forecast for
child photo shoot: flash lightning
and wailing thunder

Wednesday, April 13, 2016

Wednesday haiku

The ghost likes to drink
expensive whiskey because
he enjoys good booze

Tuesday, April 12, 2016

Tuesday haiku

Billy carries a
small flask in his hat, just to
keep his spirits up

Monday, April 11, 2016

Monday haiku

My bad handwriting
prevents folks from stealing my
words, or reading them

Saturday, April 9, 2016

Weekend haiku

I have self-loathing,
as I don't want to feel left
out from my family 


Tire losing air,
no nail to be found, so it's
obviously screwed

Friday, April 8, 2016

Friday haiku

The bloated roadkill
smelled terrible, and looked worse,
but it was tasty

Thursday, April 7, 2016

Thursday haiku

He drove cross country
with all his belongings, just
so she can't have them

Wednesday, April 6, 2016

Wednesday haiku

Bill thought "unisex"
meant making sweet love, balanced
on only one wheel

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

Tuesday haiku

We had nachos for
lunch, before President Trump
tells us that we can't

Monday, April 4, 2016

Monday haiku

While the Boy Scouts won't
allow gays to be leaders,
they can buy popcorn

Saturday, April 2, 2016

Weekend haiku

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not arrive, please resend it,
oh, and it's blurry 


The chickadee chirps
from his high branch, wondering
why I'm way down here

Friday, April 1, 2016

Friday haiku

She's so excited
to see baby goats, she feels
like a kid again